The LOTR Movie Site
February 23, 2001

The Lord of the Fakes
Thomas S.

So it finally comes to life... the Movie, it isn't?

And so everybody is happy, oh-ho, the lord of the rings, wow! There is Liv Tyler, beautiful girl, and Dracula as Saruman, and blood, steel and iron, and a macho Aragorn! Why didn't the director put Jean Claude Van Damme as Faramir and Arnold Schwarzenegger as Eomer? It could be cool!

Everybody who appreciate this crappy movie is not a real Tolkien fan, and every Tolkien fan will just spend the cinema money in anything else, like a pizza or giving it to the poor. This is the mentality of Hollywood, they don't mind the feelings, the art or the respect of millions of fans, no! they want only the money, much money stolen by the pockets of the stupid kids who like movies like Lord of the rings or Mission impossible (it's the same, there is Tom Cruise jumping off the moto and there is Liv Tyler jumping off the horse destroyng thousands of orcs with a foot on the ground and the other kicking orcs.

Will Arwen kill the Master of Nazgul with a mighty laser gunshot?
Will Mithrandir destroy Orcs with explosions and bazookas?

Another question: there is one of the best metal band of the nineties, the Blind Guardian, that writes songs on Tolkien... why they will use stupid folk musicians like Braveheart?

I hope that the set burns.
I hope that Peter Jackson die by the hand of a Balrog.
I hope that a black hole eat everything.
I hope that there is only a nightmare, maybe tomorrow i will wake up and can continue to read the Silmarillion for the hundredth time, without any crappy businessman trying to spit on the memory of the Master - J.R.R.Tolkien